I do not claim to be a talented or magnificent poet. Much of my poetry has rhyming,rhythm and/or meter problems. In fact, most of it is just talent less junk. I apologize. I write poetry to get out my feelings. I let people read it, even if it hardly deserves to be seen.
Index
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The Star Maiden
The sky, the stars, the ocean and me,
Everything I never wished to be.
My hopes, my fears, my dreams, my tears,
Before me the pain of my life, how it sears!
The poems, the books, the words so well planned,
Float away with the manuscript torn in my hand.
A flash, a light, a splash, a cry,
And here is a maiden before mine blue eye.
Starlit eyes, moonbeam hair,
A vision of loveliness, a goddess right there.
Knees on the sand, head to the sea,
"O goddess why art thou visiting me?"
A silvery laugh, an ironic smile,
"Arise I am just an angel sweet child."
Up on my feet, eyes fixed on her,
A mirror of Jesus, so eager, so pure.
Never have I seen in all of my life,
So close a mirror in all of my strife.
Crystalline voice, sweet harmony,
Together we sing of great God suddenly.
Swirling and twirling, twisting and wheeling,
The beautiful melodies ever entwining.
Singing and crying, joy and pain,
Never to return again.
Song full of wonder, beauty, and myth.
Mends my heart broken, renders up pith.
Vision of loveliness, maiden so pure,
Floats back to God's kingdom, so sure.
Tears and joy flow through my veins,
Now I am healed, God touched all my pain.
As I stand by the ocean, lonely and free,
The sky, the stars, the ocean and me,
Everything I ever wished to be.
My hopes, my fears, my dreams, my tears,
By God the pain of my life is all healed.
Mysterious Stranger
Mysterious Stranger
With dark hair and eyes,
Mysterious Stranger
Lonely am I,
Mysterious Stranger
I long to be whole,
Mysterious Stranger
Maketh me so.
Mysterious Stranger
Kiss my sad eyes,
Mysterious Stranger
Forget all my lies,
Mysterious Stranger
Hold my worn hand,
Mysterious Stranger
Do you understand?
Mysterious Stranger
I want to be healed,
Mysterious Stranger
I want my heart sealed,
Mysterious Stranger
Sore afraid am I,
Mysterious Stranger
Too long have I cried.
Mysterious Stranger
Your voice in my ear,
Mysterious Stranger
You say never to fear.
Mysterious Stranger
You tell me "be still",
Mysterious Stranger
My heart you can fill.
Mysterious Stranger
The riddles you place,
Mysterious Stranger
They light up my face.
Mysterious Stranger
They break all the rules,
Mysterious Stranger
But you are no fool.
Mysterious Stranger
Your words full of wisdom,
Mysterious Stranger
Yes, I did listen.
Mysterious Stranger
As you walk away,
Mysterious Stranger
My heart healed this day.
Mysterious Stranger
Who was He that came?
Mysterious Stranger
Jesus, Son of God, is Your name.
The Cycle
Anger
Fearsome, vengeful anger,
Brings superhuman strength.
Chair
Sturdy wooden chairs,
Leave jagged broken splinters.
Frustration
Bewildering, regretful frustration,
Brings quivering, trembling tounges.
Screams
Piercing, shattering screams,
Leave agonizing, pounding ear drums.
Despair
Hopeless, harrowing despair,
Brings stinging fervid tears.
Sobs
Desperate, impassioned sobs,
Leave bleary hollow eyes.
Brokeness
Complete, total brokeness,
Brings empty heartless souls.
Silence
Echoing eloquent silence,
Leave pensive weary thoughts.
Repentance,
Whole hearted repentance,
Brings excruciating relief.
Singing
Joyfully despairing singing,
Leaves drained contended hearts.
Poetry has fled my soul
Poetry has fled my soul
Inspiration flees my mind
eloquence deserts my lips
rhythm evades ear mine
poetry has fled my soul
nothing flows from imagination tonight
no words to grace the paper
my struggle, pain, fear and despair
Poetry has fled my soul
scribbles and meaningless babble replace
nothing makes sense anymore
frustration instead shall flow from my pen
poetry has fled my soul
The Divine Mystery
A rippling celestial melody,
Resounds in the depths of the night.
The heartfelt whisper of the wind,
Tousles a song into the trees.
The brilliancy of eons far stars,
Outshine glistening diamonds.
A sorrow incomprehensible,
Fuses with a beautiful majesty uncaptured.
The joy of healed lives,
Merges with the despair of crumbled empires.
The measureless infinite,
Engulfs the senses.
Epiphany and eternity,
Unclose a soul and stagger a mind.
A powerful echo of the enigmatic past,
Abides on through this ethereal night.
A mystery that elucidates all others,
And compels the simplest of minds.
The ultimate sacrifice to end the cycle of sin,
Purges the fall of mankind.
The awesome immutable,
Is absorbed in great draughts.
The apprehended confirmation,
Of the presence of Most High.
Galaxies will spin,
As lives will tear in two.
Stars will burn the night,
While worlds will blast away.
But this mystery, inconceivable by finite minds,
Will stand firm forever.
Dark Lies
Within a darkened cavern,
A soft, glowing white hand beckons.
Whispers of promised power,
Tendrils of black fog envelop.
Come and flirt with evil.
Dance on the edge of danger.
Songs of power and myths of sorrowful wonder.
Something deep and mysterious calls thy name.
Clasp the hand to follow it.
Sniff the powders and transcend the weak and shallow.
Join hands and slowly chant.
Feel the power and the evil course through your veins.
Tremble and chant ever louder.
There are spirits to recall.
Moaning voices of the otherworld.
Command the spirts, control the power.
Let the evil in farther
Move from flirting and dancing to a more intimate relationship.
Take the cup and drain it.
Taste the bitter contents and know the joy of vampires.
Come deeper in.
Leave fields of gold and skies of blue behind.
Know the truth and the depth of the dark side of life.
Chanting grows louder.
Black fog shall devour
Power...
The joy of...
What joy...
faces of woe...
Powerless fiends of fear and oppression...
Cold chains of iron wrap.
Nothing but fear and bondage.
Withered hands which barely cling to life.
Stuck in a cruel limbo of fear.
Alone and powerless.
Feeble deceptions and lurings of the naive and foolish for pleasure.
No hope.
No past.
No future.
No depth.
No feelings.
Only oppression, fear and bondage.
Everything sought is not here.
It resides in the light.
Joy ...
Promise...
Freedom...
Depth...
Mystery...
Love...
Charity...
Sweat, tears, and prayers.
Release the hand of evil.
Return O Light to guide me.
Save me...
Show me the path I seek...
Bitter Mercenaries
The wave of loneliness overwhelms my soul,
From the place of complacency where I used to stay.
The lines I had drawn then to keep my heart whole,
Come screaming back to tear apart that which I wish they'd defend.
Rhetorical Metaphysics
This world is so full of torment, despair, sinful pleasures, and mediocre pressures,
That it is worth no more than a cheap trinket of plastic found in a San Francisco gift store.
So why do some sell their soul to the devil to gain it?
I refuse to be sucked into the vaccuum of empty dreams,
Just so I can have five minutes of gainless fame and be lonely and forgotten the moment I die.
So why does everyone shun this choice as foolish and inconcievable?
We could have meaning, identity, eternal life and joy,
If we would just give all we have away.
So why do people cling to their empty souls to blend into the wall they so desperately want to stand out from?
Why is it that people run from the very thing they are searching for?
Why do they deny and disbelieve?
Trudging down a highway,
A figure of despair,
Gun toting infant,
Clutching a teddy bear.
Rain is pouring down,
But her nightgown�s wet with blood.
Rivulets pouring down her cheeks,
But they are not rain or mud.
She fashioned the leering gun,
With her plastic happiness.
Then loaded her resplendent toy,
With clandestine bitterness.
She administered bullet holes,
Gushing blood and pain.
Scattered souls with best intentions,
Lay around her battered frame.
Trudging down a highway,
A figure of despair,
Gun toting infant,
Clutching a teddy bear.
Rain is pouring down,
But her nightgown�s wet with blood.
Rivulets pouring down her cheeks,
But they are not rain or mud.
Fearful paranoia,
Beset her addled head.
Demons were her best friends,
Spinning lies for her to tread.
�All their love is fabricated
And their care is but a lie,�
Thus delusions poisoning her head,
Would carefully imply.
Trudging down a highway,
A figure of despair,
Gun toting infant,
Clutching a teddy bear.
Rain is pouring down,
But her nightgown�s wet with blood.
Rivulets pouring down her cheeks,
But they are not rain or mud.
Thus she ran from all that supervened,
With guilt and gun and teddy bear.
Screaming through the night,
Beyond a quiet place of prayer.
She craves a happy ending,
With a champion complete,
But the road is cold and dark,
Bereft of people to entreat.
Trudging down a highway,
A figure of despair,
Gun toting infant,
Clutching a teddy bear.
If you see this wretched infant,
(Her nightgown�s wet with blood).
Help her staunch the rivulets,
(For they are not rain or mud).
Untitled
Speak up
I can't quite hear what you're saying
I wasn't really listening though
It's not as if I actually believe you
I was too caught up in my reflection
It makes me cry you know
It's so far from who I thought I was
It's so different from who you said you saw
So who is the one with distorted vision?
Is it me or was it you?
Wherefrom the dark entanglements?
What lies are you trying to tell me?
Throwing compliments by my wayside
Shedding joyful tears for me to catch.
I let them fall unheeded
They were only tokens of my humiliation
So give it up
Maybe you should just leave me be
Until you lose your blinders
Or I lose mine
Oh his love and mine
Or
In The Half light of Morning
Part the First
Written in a foolish fit of passion
For no one in particular
In the deceptive half light
Of a rainy morning
A beautifully tragic pain
Trembles through my soul
A lovely poison welcomed
To chase away my sorrows
Although only to create more
Oh his love and mine�
My hand reposes upon my breast
Feeling his words thrill through my heart
To echo tragically in my soul
Oh his love and mine�
Oh do not profane my guilty joy
Let me whisper his name into the dark
Allow me to throw caution to the wind
And indulge in bittersweet fantasies
Oh his love and mine�
Let my eyes grow bleary
From another sleepless night
Enveloped in the desperate
Ecstasy of this better love
Oh his love and mine�
My soul shall cry its happiness
With the cold rain washing my window
It shall wash the stain of bitterness from my soul
I shall rejoice and rest in the foolish abandon
Encased in the feeling
Enwrapped in those fatal words,
�I love him�
Part the second
Behold the smudged ink
Behold my shame
The words feel profane on my lips
Through my vastly obsessive misusage
Take my hand and wash the ink away
Kiss it and return it to me
Grant me forgiveness
For such foolish passion
Pure and innocent were his words
Unsuspecting and unambitious
Simple and childlike
And I have taken and raped them�
To death�
To death�
Should go�
His love and mine�
Then We Shed Our Crimson Tears
Tossing about
In little clay ships
On a cloudy sea of memories
Crying our eyes out
For our treacheries won�t save us
And we fly our flags at half-mast
To convey how sorrowfully beguiled we feel
The ships rush onward
Towards the midst of dun storms
And our sight is clouded with terror
We screech recklessly
�til we crash and we splinter
And those thousand pieces of love and clay
Scatter across a tearless sky
Where no tender hands will catch them
We are caught up on the waves
And pitched into the sea
Now blinded by fear and by doubt
We turn on each other and sever binding heart strings
And then load our cannons
With malicious intent and cold hearted sham hatred
And send them screaming through the sky
On heartless excursions
To breach holes in each other�s hearts
Then we shed our crimson tears
As we tumble off our pride
And fall into the sea
To a watery grave
No quantum of deceptive lies
Can save us from
Telegraph Poles and Chimera C[h]ords
A poem by Megan.
Hand strums
telegraph poles
are chimera c[h]ords
vibrating
soft woodwork
of conjoined hearts
is said to be
dangling from
puppet strings
wound around
tattooed fingers
dancing blindly
to morse code
of wishes
painting dreams
in ersatz melodies
of desperation of
desire
snatches
joy away ere
go contentment
to thy doom
she chants
I missed
the target
is Fate
?
A poem by me
A sweet endearment
A pink blush
And a delighted smile betrays the twinkle in downcast eyes
A rapidly pounding heart
A quiver of desire
And forbidden touches hover on fingertips like butterflies
A rhapsodic flood
A provisional dam
And the slight tremble of a chaste lip poses a Herculean threat
A whispered wish
A shared breath
And the enchanting veil portends a rip
A heart rending gaze
A soft, slow sigh
And souls exchange kisses in the captivating tension of prohibited lovers' eyes
Chasing down comets
Crashing into moon beams
Tearing through the universe
Borne on waves of harmony
The deeper pulsing of the universe
Engulfing me with an unspoken language
More beautiful than clumsy speech
Reverberating in the veins
Gentle joy teaching me the stitches
With which to mend a broken heart
Showing me how to remember
Yet forgetful of pain and bitterness
Embracing my sorrows
Parceling my griefs
Demonstrating wisdom
Spelling out hope
Bright stars
Which will blind the fool
And light the path of the child
Chivvying with the mirthful beacons
They will rescue me yet
My companions of mercy...
Performing acts of kindness for an empty theater
Dining on honesty in restaurants with empty tables
Steadfastly trudging down empty sidewalks
Gaining only echoes of her admissions from the empty alleys
Driving ships of trust along empty dirt roads
Fingering tokens of friendship in empty shops
Soliciting compassion in empty neighborhoods
Tracing figures of speech on empty skating ponds
Searching for companions in an empty world
I dropped off my passengers and took a wrong turn
Lost, afraid, cold, wounded, but all alone
All alone
All she wanted was a kind word�
What were their excuses?
Where is everyone?
In which we trace the outlines
A tiny child grapples my leg
Sometimes gorgeous
Sometimes wretched
By turns he is strong as an ox or withered by disease
He clasps his tiny hands round my neck
He draws his lips in red ink close by
He sucks the life blood from me to gorge his insatiable appetite
Leaves imprints of tiny fingers in beautiful bruises on my neck
He beats me ruthlessly
But will turn to cuddle me in a cold forbidding manner
He wrings the floods of tears from my eyes
And we dance elaborate evasions of predator and prey along the paths of life
A deadly struggle for power
To gain and hold the upper hand
His goal is always death
In any shape or form
I put a deadly poison in his veins and will bring it to him instead
Yet�
It works far too slowly for my enfeebled almost corpse�
Shun him
Damn him
My angel. My demon. My vampire. My comrade. My paintbrush. My contradiction My irony.
My Pain.
Just chain smoke the empathy away
Then you can't feel me through the bitter ash heaped upon your tongue
There are so many things which will remain unsaid our entire lives
And don't you regret it already?
Like how you loved her kisses.
Like how you hate the way I smile at you through my tears.
We'll never really know what the other was thinking
Because we are too content to be mere shadows of ardour
Like how it's easier to sketch your abstract pictures than it is to build a bridge
Like how it's safer to stare at the tv than it is to look him in the eye.