2004-05-05
There's Been A Brain Short Circuit...

hearing: nothin cause I'm gettin ready to go outside, but I have Halo from The Gravity Show stuck in my head...
reading: Miracles - C.S. Lewis
wearing: pink crossover sleeveless shirt, lighter pink just past knee length skirt with flowers...its all floaty and junk, black wristwarmer, silver necklace with a diamond pendant, messy hair

Do you know exactly how preoccupied and troubled I am? So much so, that I honestly did not hear my mother talking to me. It wasn't hearing trouble, but concentration. More than halfway through what she said, I jolted to reality and realized she was talking to me and had been for quite some time. I blinked and asked her what she had just said again. She restarted and I was even more confused while I was trying to listen to her. I couldn't make out what she was saying at all. So I nodded and mechanically spewed out a few neutral answers and retreated back within myself.

I am a little stunned that I am really that spaced out. That I couldn't even hear her, that I couldn't even understand what she was saying. And I can feel myself drifting out even now.

And that's that. I am loathe to say what is troubling me. I hardly admit it to myself. But... *shakes head and sighs* I think I just need some time alone.

But I don't want anyone to worry either. I'm fine. I'm fine. Hush hush. Don't worry about me. Nothing's wrong. Nothing's wrong...

before & & after