I present to you myself, an awesome failure.
No, of course I didn't flunk the driving test. I haven't even taken it yet. What I mean by being a failure, is that once again, I am up too late. I was not up this morning until 7:30am. That was when we were supposed to be out the door with the cat. Not barely waking up. I could have clunked my head on the wall. My parents are never going to believe I can get up on time for anything and I'm beginning to wonder if I can too. I have plenty of excuses for being up late, but they're just that, excuses. Not many things in my life are going to make room for my mistakes.
Last night I went to bed at about 10:45pm. I was tired, very sick, and crying. Yes, I'm a loser. I was crying. For several reasons. One of them being my illness, and another being nervousness, and the others being unspeakable. I laid down in bed and cried a little a bit, and eventually drifted off into a restless, fevered half sleep.
I awoke from this briefly at one, but only very briefly. I quickly fell back to sleep, and this time it was a deeper sleep. But I dreamt. Holy cow I dreamt. And I startled up at 5:00am with tears in my eyes from that dream. It made me so heartsick. After that I tossed and turned and moaned and half-consciously cried out people's names. My throat was bothering me from the dry heat in the air and I was, by turns, too hot and too cold. At around 6, 6:15, only fifteen to thirty minutes before I wanted to wake up, I fell back asleep. I dreamt again, and the dreams was a tad scary near the end and not at all fun. I woke up and shuddered and it was 7:30.
I plunked out of bed, grabbed some clothes, and scurried to the shower. To find my sister taking a bath. WTF?!?!?!?! I've never seen her awake before twelve before! I was shocked! Why this morning of all mornings to take a bath so early? I kicked her out and told her that I was the one going places early in the morning and NOT her so I had the right to the bathroom. She conceded and left. I'm sure we might have had a fist fight right then and there if I hadn't been in such a rush.
She has never been a morning person in all her life. She's always been irritable and grumpy. I used to be a morning person, I used to thrive on early mornings, until I was about fifteen. But with age, came an extreme distaste for early morning and an affinity for the night. I've shifted from morning person, to night owl, and mornings are no longer a good time to cross my path. So we were both pretty built up, and as good as we get along most of the time, when we're both in a bad mood and not to be bothered, yet we bother each other anyway, frightening violence erupts.
Fortunately none did, I took my shower, I was cold and sick-ish still, blah blah blah, now I'm writing an entry to waste my time. To think, that in just a couple of hours, my driving test will be over. I'm praying to God that I can pass it.
Oh give me concentration...